


Twas the Glob Before Christmas

by RedManScott



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:01:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21912589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedManScott/pseuds/RedManScott
Summary: When Christmas & Santa come to Krakoa, Glob and No-Girl are on the case! *An X-Men inspired remix of "Twas the Night Before Christmas* (Avoids current comic book era spoilers).
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6
Collections: 2019 Xplain Yuletide X-Men Fanwork Xchange





	Twas the Glob Before Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GrayJay](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GrayJay/gifts).



‘Twas the night before Christmas,

When all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a Wolverine. The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, as Glob hopped that St. Nicholas soon would be there. All the X-children were nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of Krakoa danced in their heads; and No-Girl in her jet-powered floating bubble and Glob in his dashing red cap had just settled in for a nice winter chat; When out on the island there arose such a clatter, Glob sprang from the chair to see what was the matter. 

Out of the hut, he flew like a flash, tore down the path as fast as his pink gel body could as No-Girl flew along behind. The moon, through the trees canopies, gave a luster of midday to objects below, when, what to Glob’s wondering eyes should appear, But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer, with a little driver so lively and quick, he knew in a moment it must be St. Nick!  
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came, And he whistled and shouted and called them by name: “Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donner and Blitzen! To the top of the Red Keep, to the top of the House of X, now, dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane flew, it was then that Glob knew: “Santa up in the sky, up to the housetop as he flew with a sleigh full of toys, must be a mutant!” For how else could a man, even one so jolly, be allowed to the mutant paradise? Clearly it was true, and No-Girl knew it too as she let her friend know. 

Then with a twinkling, they heard upon the ground nearby the prancing and pawing of each little hoof. With a jingle and a jangle, Santa did make his way into the nearby home. Glob drew his head back in, threw up his hands, and barreled into that Santa entered with abound. 

He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot, and his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot; a bundle of toys he had flung on his back, and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.  
His eyes-how they twinkled! 

His dimples – how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry. His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, and the beard on his chin was as white as Magneto’s costume. The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath, as he smelled like Wolverine. He had a broad face and a little round belly that shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly. He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf, and Glob laughed when he saw him, in spite of himself. 

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head soon gave Glob to know there was nothing to dread. 

Santa was not a stranger, Santa was not a danger. 

Santa was a mutant, one well known. 

For you see, this Santa also went by the name of Fred Dukes, the man known as Blob. 

He spoke not a word, but went straight to work, and filled the stockings; placing all the things beneath the tree. 

A shiny new Cerebro for the Professor. 

Rapiers gleaming and sharp for the amazing Nightcrawler. 

Diamonds so bright for the Queen of White. 

A six-pack and a half for the slumbering Wolverine. 

Nothing but the best dad jokes for Cyclops. 

For Gabby so sweet, baskets full of treats (for Jonathan as well). 

Higher and higher the pile did grow, gifts for all those that called the island paradise their home. 

From Apocalypse to Sinister to Forge to Sage to Kings both Black and Red to Nw Mutants and New X-Men. The spirit of giving knows no bounds when one lives within paradise. 

The job done, Santa Blob turned with a jerk, laying his finger aside of his nose and giving a nod, out the door he did race. He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, and away those mechanical reindeer did fly like the down of a thistle. 

Santa has now gone, but the story is not quite done. 

Throughout Krakoa, there rose such a clatter as mutants all rose to see what was the matter. Down the island they raced, coming there to the place where it all happened. 

Gifts upon gifts, lifted high into the sky, was their discovery. 

One by one they took what was theirs. 

A new set of robes for Apocalypse (though he preferred to be called ▪︎-|A|-▪︎).

Beers downed with a burp and a bub by the surly Wolverine. 

A shouted “En garde” with rapiers whistling through the air by Nightcrawler. 

Throaty chuckle and ample groans greet the Cyclops’ dad jokes aplenty. 

Gabby and Jonathan passed out for the night, tummy’s full of treats so tight. 

Shiny and bright does stand the queen of white, a smile of delight upon her face. 

Christmas cheer spread far and wide upon the island nation, a tradition not yet forgotten in this new mutant nation. Questions arose, to the make of all these gifts. 

Quickly did Glob rise, striding to stand in the middle with an ample “I have answers” belted far and wide. All eyes did fall upon the gooey mutant and his companion within her protective bubble, No-Girl staying strangely silent. 

“Christmas is the time for family near and far, whether blood or not, to come together & celebrate another year & give the gifts that they desire.”

“But these gifts,” they cried, “Did Krakoa make them for us so near?”

“Oh dear no, there was another this day that brought you such joy. His cheeks so merry and rosy like cherries, the beard on his chin so white, like the costume of Magneto. Cheery & jolly, a belly like a bowl full of jelly. Santa is among us, and Santa is a mutant.”

Nothing but silence as they all did stare, not quite certain what to share. Then like a crack and a boom, their laughter did ring out. From coast to coast of Krakoa the echo did sound, the laughter of hundreds of mutants. It was like music, if not for the sting to the heart of the gelatinous one in which it was aimed. 

“Oh Glob,” they cried. “Don’t be so silly. That can’t be the truth, really.”

Gifts in hand, they did wander away, the middle of the island their destination already ready for the nights of parties to come. 

Alone once more, Glob and No-Girl did find themselves. 

“Santa is real. Santa is one of us, of that we know,” he said firmly. “We don’t need them anyway.”

With a jingle and a jangle of bells and a flurry of noise, all eyes flew to the skies as Santa did return. Merry and jolly and belly still shaking like a bowl full of jelly, smiling at the mutants below. Gasps and shouts did erupt, all doubts washed away. 

A whoop & a shout, hands in the air, Glob did dance as all was now revealed. 

Santa was real, and Santa was indeed one of them. 

As he drove out of sight, all did hear him exclaim:

“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”


End file.
